Funeral wake ideas: funeral reception food, decorations and more
In this article, we explore ideas for funeral wakes, including food and drink, decorations and centrepieces.
When a person dies, there's a lot to organise. One of the most pressing jobs is to arrange the funeral and often the funeral wake.
The wake is a gathering of friends and family to mourn the person who has died. It can be held either before or after the funeral, burial or cremation. In the UK, it's typically held after the funeral service.
These days, wakes don't have to be traditionally sombre affairs. They can be an informal reception or even an upbeat celebration of life.
Whatever you choose to do, the most important thing is to consider the wishes and personality of the person who died. If in doubt, think about how they would feel about the arrangements that you're making.
Funeral directors can offer help when you're arranging a funeral wake. Some people, however, prefer to do it themselves.
This article is intended to give you some ideas for funeral wakes. Not every idea will suit every occasion, but we hope it points you in the right direction.
Food and drink
Food and drink is an important part of any funeral wake. Most of the time, food for funeral wakes is comforting, easy to prepare and easy for guests to eat while socialising.
For this reason, finger buffets and cold spreads are a popular choice. That could include sandwiches, sausage rolls, savoury snacks and simple cakes.
For large gatherings, people often choose large, hearty dishes like mac and cheese, casseroles or pasta. Afternoon tea with scones is also a popular choice.
There's no reason, however, why you should stick to these traditional dishes. If you want, you can serve the favourite food of the person who died, whether that's a main dish, dessert or snack.
In terms of drinks, tea and coffee are staples at funeral wakes. Alcohol is optional. You can choose an alcoholic or non-alcoholic drink with which to toast the person who died.
You may want to cater to dietary requirements by including vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free options where appropriate. Allergies should also be taken into consideration.
Centrepiece ideas
Often, a funeral wake will have a table, wall or other part of the room that acts as a centrepiece. This might feature photos and memorabilia related to the person who has died. It might also have a screen showing a slideshow of images and memories or video footage.
You might want to put a memory jar or memory book for people to write memories of the person who died or condolences to the family. You could also put out candles for participants to light.
Flowers and other greenery are often included at wakes and funeral receptions. As with other centrepiece ideas, these can be as traditional or as personalised as you think appropriate.
Funeral wake playlists
If the person who died loved music, why not create a collaborative personalised playlist of their favourite songs or songs that remind you of them? This can create a meaningful soundtrack to the gathering.
Dress codes
More often than not, people dress in smart clothes and dark colours when they go to funeral wakes.
However, if you think it's appropriate to the person who died, you can encourage people to wear bright-coloured clothes. You could also consider clothes that relate to the person's interests – the strip of the football team they supported, say.
Locations
A funeral wake can be held almost anywhere. It can be held at home for a small, intimate gathering or in a public place such as a pub, park, beach or community centre.
Funeral wakes don't have to be indoors, either. If the weather is good, you could host a picnic, barbecue or garden party. Having the wake outdoors could be especially appropriate if the person who died loved nature.
If the event is themed, the location can tie into the theme. For instance, the wake for a music lover could be held at a music venue. Meanwhile, you might hold a wake for a gardener in a public park or garden.
The wake could be a meal at the favourite restaurant of the person who died. This is typically best for small gatherings, although some restaurants will accommodate larger bookings.
Activities
Most funeral wakes are social occasions where people talk, eat and remember the person who died. However, you can build activities into the wake.
You could, for instance, hold an open-mic-style storytelling session, inviting participants to share memories of the person who has died.
If the person loved nature, you could invite guests to plant seeds or trees in a beautiful spot. This has the added advantage of memorialising the person who died with plants or trees that can be visited and revisited over the years.
If you want the funeral wake to feel more like a party, you could include entertainment such as live music or karaoke. As with all aspects of funeral wake planning, it all depends on the personality and wishes of the person you're remembering.
Decorations
A traditional wake might have a memory table, flowers and soft lighting. There could also be mementoes reflecting the career, hobbies or collections of the person who died.
If you want the wake to be more personalised, however, the sky's the limit. The event could, for instance, be colour-coordinated in the loved one's favourite colour or colours.
Photos, videos and other mementoes can be presented any way you like. To take just one example, photos could be hung from string around the room like festive decorations.
Conclusion
A funeral wake is all about providing a space for friends and family to remember the person who died. Whatever you choose, the main thing is to think about the personality and wishes of the person who died. With that in mind, it's hard to go wrong.
AFD is a team of independent funeral directors in North London. We help families across Greater London with compassionate, step-by-step funeral planning support. If you need our help, please call 020 8355 7876 – our lines are always open.
