Poems for Father's funeral: death and sympathy poetry for dads
Many funerals feature poetry readings. Here are 6 powerful suggestions for the funeral of a father.
When a person dies, many things need to be done. Near the top of the list is organising a funeral service. That often involves choosing music to play and poetry to read.
Sometimes, it's easy to choose a poem. This is especially true if the person who died had a favourite poet or poem.
At other times, however, it can be a difficult decision. You may worry about getting the tone wrong or choosing something that doesn't reflect the values or personality of the person who died.
One of the advantages of working with a funeral director or funeral celebrant is that they'll often provide you with examples of poetry for the funeral.
At Akshardham Funeral Directors, we believe there are no right or wrong choices when it comes to funerals. If you think a poem is right (and it won't offend the people at the funeral), then it's probably the right choice.
Despite this, lots of people look for guidance at this difficult time. To help you, here are six powerful poems you could read at the funeral of a father.
Six funeral poems for Dad
"Crossing the Bar" by Alfred, Lord Tennyson
In this poem, the Victorian poet Alfred, Lord Tennyson compares death to crossing a sandbar (a ridge of sand in the sea). In this case, the sandbar stands between the river of life and the sea of death or immortality.
The poet asks for a peaceful journey into the unknown:
And may there be no moaning of the bar,
When I put out to sea…
He ends by asking his loved ones for "no sadness of farewell". Yes, he is going far away, but he hopes he will meet God on the other side:
I hope to see my Pilot face to face
When I have crossed the bar.
2. "Memory of my Father" by Patrick Kavanagh
In "Memory of my Father", the Irish poet Patrick Kavanagh talks about the many men who remind him of his late father:
Every old man I see
In October-coloured weather
Seems to say to me:
"I was once your father."
It's a poem that reflects how memories of loved ones linger after they die. It also describes some of the hardships people faced during the poet's lifetime.
3. "Album" by R. S. Thomas
In this bittersweet poem, Welsh poet R.S. Thomas describes looking through a family photo album. It begins without fanfare: "My father is dead."
In spite of the pain of life and death, the smiles of the people in the photograph tell Thomas that time will heal his grief:
…there is no wound
time gives that is not bandaged
by time.
We're left with the image of the family smiling at R.S. Thomas, now a man, looking at them through tears.
It's a powerful poem that asks the simple question: "What does it mean?"
4. "Immortality" by Clare Harner
First published in 1934, this poem is often known by its opening lines: "Do not stand by my grave and weep."
It's a reassuring poem: a voice from beyond telling the living not to grieve. The person is no longer in the grave. They're now "the thousand winds that blow" and "the sunlight on ripened grain".
With its simple language and natural imagery, this could be a good choice of poem for a father who was optimistic, gentle and a lover of nature.
5. "Epitaph on my Own Friend" by Robert Burns
Robert Burns, the national poet of Scotland, wrote "Epitaph on my Own Friend" for William Muir, a friend of Burns and his father.
It's a short, sweet poem that grieves "an honest man" who made the best of his life. It ends poignantly:
If there's another world, he lives in bliss;
If there is none, he made the best of this.
With its simple language and sentiment, this could be a moving poem to read at a funeral service for Dad.
6. "My Heart Leaps Up" by William Wordsworth
When a person dies, people often think about how that person influenced the new generation.
This is something the Romantic poet William Wordsworth touches on in his short poem "My Heart Leaps Up". This poem is the source of the famous line "The Child is father of the Man".
The poem is about the way childhood joys can continue into manhood – in Wordsworth's case, the simple sight of a rainbow:
My heart leaps up when I behold
A rainbow in the sky:
So was it when my life began;
So is it now I am a man;
So be it when I shall grow old,
Or let me die!
This concise and beautiful poem could be a fitting tribute to a dad who loved nature and who passed that love on to his children.
How to choose a funeral poem for Dad
Choosing a funeral poem for a father isn't always easy. It's important to remember, however, that most people won't judge you for your choice. As long as the poem is respectful, it's likely to go down well.
Because of this, it can be best to rely on your instinct when choosing your poem. Ask yourself: which poem speaks to you? Which one reminds you of your father? Which one can you imagine will make people at the funeral think about him fondly?
Writing your own poem
You can always write your own poem for the funeral of a loved one. We wrote about this in our guide on how to write a poem for a funeral. As we said there, "The simple act of writing a poem for a funeral shows love, care and compassion."
We hope you found a poem that feels right for the funeral you're planning. Here at Akshardham Funeral Directors, we share lots of advice and inspiration to help you arrange the funeral you want. Why not take a look at some more funeral ideas?
